When Does It Get Good?

E5: Shift Happens: Unexpected Career Moves with KiKi L'Italien

Feeling stuck in your career path or contemplating a significant change? Zovig Garboushian explores this question with her former colleague, KiKi L'Italien, the VP of Marketing for Big Red M and Editor-in-Chief of Association Chat. KiKi shares insights into her pivotal shift from a decade-long career as a solopreneur to embracing a role within a larger organization—a transition characterized by self-discovery and emotional challenges.
 
Delving into the courage it takes to challenge long-standing beliefs about professional identity and the importance of staying open to new opportunities, KiKi's story is a testament to vulnerability and the capacity to adapt without losing sight of one's core. Zovig highlights that KiKi's path of conscious choice and adaptation serves as an inspiration for anyone facing adversity, providing hope and a reminder of the strength that lies in self-awareness.
 
KiKi offers listeners actionable advice to approach recurring themes in their lives with curiosity and to explore why certain situations trigger discomfort. Her insights are a valuable guide for those navigating their relationship with their career and personal aspirations.
 
Quotes
"I like to create things. I like autonomy. I have a lot of great ideas and I like to build on them. What ended up happening was along the way, I started doing some work on myself where I was dealing with some stuff, with some past trauma. And I think for me, I'm 47 years old. And when you get to a certain point, hopefully if you're living life right, you become self-aware enough that you're like, well, let me get a little self-introspective here and begin to explore some of this stuff because there might be some things I need to sort out." (06:57 | KiKi L'Italien) 
"We can become just straight up bitter. We can become angry and just be that angry person. But there's a difference between being it and experiencing it. Experiencing it means it's a transient experience." (15:47 | Zovig Garboushian)
"I feel like the labels connected to entrepreneur, solopreneur, or employee should just become a little bit flexible because we can switch in and out. We can change as we need to. Basically, it's what works for us and as long as we don't get too tied with our identity, to what one of those labels mean, you can be entrepreneurial, you can definitely create things while you're working for somebody else." (24:31 | KiKi L'Italien) 
"Answering what's really bothering you is probably the most valuable thing that you can do." (43:55 | KiKi L'Italien) 
"If you see these themes in your life where there's this one sort of message that's coming to you pretty clearly over and over again, explore why, what is it about that that's really bothering you? And don't let go of exploring that because it might not just be locked in some sort of thing with your past or your history. It might be in the way that you engage with your career now. It might be in how you engage with your home life, your relationship to your health or fitness. It could be anything, but get curious." (44:01 | KiKi L'Italien) 
 
Links
Connect with KiKi L'Italien:
Website/Blog: https://associationchat.com/
Facebook/Meta: https://www.facebook.com/groups/AssociationChat
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kikilitalien/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kikilitalien/ 
Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/kikilitalien
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/AssociationChat
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/42X3jBRrR8toIVugVZ6KMh
Connect with Zovig Garboushian:
Website: www.boldnessablazecoaching.com
 
Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

E4: How to Stop People Pleasing

"People-pleasing is a killer of our physical, emotional, financial, mental, and spiritual energy, and it's a total time suck," declares host Zovig Gaboushian as she delves into the detrimental impact of prioritizing others over oneself. Exploring the underlying causes of people-pleasing, from past traumas to an ingrained need for validation and fear of rejection, she discusses strategies for overcoming this behavior.
 
With a focus on understanding the roots and consequences of people-pleasing, Zovig explains why many people fall into this trap, even those who view themselves as confident and assertive. She breaks down the characteristics of people-pleasing: the inability to set boundaries, a tendency to overcommit and accommodate "energy vampires," among others. These behaviors not only teach others how to treat us but can also lead to burnout and a loss of self.
 
Zovig challenges listeners with introspective questions designed to confront their fears and reconsider their responses to requests from a place of self-respect. She advocates for setting boundaries as a critical step toward reclaiming one's time and energy.
 
This episode offers practical advice and encouragement for those looking to break free from people-pleasing and live a life characterized by genuine generosity, self-respect, and fulfilling connections.
 
Quotes
"We have all kinds of boundaries. And in people-pleasing, those boundaries are often violated. They're violated by always saying yes." (06:07 | Zovig Garboushian) 
"Procrastination is a big byproduct of people-pleasing. When we say yes to too many things or something we don't want to do, the motivation that we have to do it is probably slim to none." (14:24 | Zovig Garboushian)
"If you're people-pleasing, you're lying about what you really need." (21:29 | Zovig Garboushian)
"Take a look at Instagram, because there are many people on that platform that have amazing talent and skill, but they're just going for the likes. They just want the likes. That is a form of validation. When we don't believe our own story, essentially what we're doing is we're asking someone to fill in the blanks. When we don't believe in our own worth, we are asking for someone to tell us what we are worth. And we will be worth something different to everybody depending on what they need. So a need for validation can get us into trouble because we are disconnected. It's a clue and a sign that we might be disconnected from our own worth." (22:19 | Zovig Garboushian) 
"When you start to experiment with setting the boundaries, saying no more, or whatever your version of the people-pleasing was, and sort of limiting that people-pleasing, notice who's with you and who's for you and who's not. They will really surface what deserves your time and attention. And the impact of that, deeper relationships, deeper trust, and you get to have more respect and compassion and connection to yourself. Remember, you can lead or you can please, but you cannot do both." (30:46 | Zovig Garboushian) 
Links
Connect with Zovig Garboushian:
Website: www.boldnessablazecoaching.com
 
Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

E3: How to Let Go of Perfectionism

Perfectionism holds us back. While this may sound like stating the obvious, it's actually much more complex. Zovig Garboushian explores this complexity in this episode of “When Does It Get Good?” by delving into the nuanced differences between striving for excellence and falling into the trap of perfectionism—a path marked by external pressures, fear, and an insatiable drive for flawless performance.
 
Drawing a clear line between the healthy pursuit of excellence and the detrimental pursuit for perfection, Zovig illustrates how excellence fosters growth and learning, whereas perfectionism is rooted in the fear of not measuring up to external standards and expectations. She explores both the external forces, such as societal pressures and the influence of social media, and internal battles, including "all-or-nothing" thinking and the pervasive "not-enough" syndrome, that fuel perfectionism.
 
Zovig outlines actionable strategies for breaking free from the habit of perfectionism: recognizing and challenging perfectionist thoughts, engaging in self-reflection to rewrite empowering narratives, seeking support from communities that provide honest feedback, dissociating perfection from identity, and embracing excellence over perfection instead.
 
Through personal stories and experiences, this episode is both a reflection on Zovig’s own journey through perfectionism and a guide for others to discover their true potential by finding balance and self-compassion and choosing excellence over unattainable perfection. 
 
Quotes
"Pursuing perfectionism is not the same as pursuing excellence. Pursuing excellence is about wanting to do our best work at any given time and taking into account that we are always improving. Excellence is intrinsically motivated, which means it comes from within. It doesn't mean I'm trying to prove anything. Instead, I want to be excellent because when I do anything at my level of excellence, then it adds value to the world and it feels good while I do it. Pursuing excellence gives you space to learn and make mistakes and get through the growing pains that are inevitable when we do anything." (02:17 | Zovig Garboushian) 
"There's always room for change and for growth. Striving for excellence gives you the grace to learn and to make mistakes and to be yourself and to feel good while it's happening." (04:12 | Zovig Garboushian) 
"We have these tools and platforms that are supposed to connect us, and to a degree they do, but they allow for so much manipulation that our expectations are skewed of what's real and what's not." (09:06 | Zovig Garboushian)
"Perfectionism is not your personality. It isn't your identity. It's a coping mechanism. It works against you." (20:16 | Zovig Garboushian) 
"It is not your job to know everything. It is your job to be learning and evolving. That is the difference between perfection, which is impossible, and excellence, which is very possible. Perfection does not exist. It keeps us stuck in place. It tells us we have to know more before we can make a move. It prevents us from hitting send and publish and accept. If I waited to be perfect before I started this podcast, I'd be waiting until I died.  Perfection keeps us stuck and it allows for no growth." (25:21 | Zovig Garboushian) 
Links
Connect with Zovig Garboushian:
Website: www.boldnessablazecoaching.com
Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

E2: 6 Coaching Principles to Help You Feel Personal Freedom

"Let go or be dragged." This is one of the favorite quotes of host Zovig Garboushian that aligns perfectly with one of her executive coaching principles. In this episode of "When Does It Get Good," Zovig shares the transformative power of embracing six core principles in both coaching and personal life:
 
Take it or leave it.
You are always at choice.
Self-awareness is the antidote to self-doubt. 
There is no there.
You already know the answer.
We all have an essence.
 
These principles are not merely strategies; they are gateways to self-discovery and empowerment.  These can shift how we approach our choices, imbuing us with a sense of empowerment even in less than ideal circumstances.
 
Zovig advocates valuing the journey of growth over the pursuit of a non-existent state of perfection. She encourages embracing every step of this journey as an integral part of life, urging listeners to trust their inner wisdom and explore their unique value to the world.
 
Whether you're navigating leadership challenges, personal growth, or seeking a deeper understanding of your path, this episode serves as a guide to move forward. It invites you to embark on a journey of self-discovery, offering principles that promise to transform how you view yourself and your place in the world.
 
Quotes
"To be able to take something or leave something gives you freedom. It gives you freedom to be creative and try stuff. It gives you freedom to speak the truth and not worry so much about people not walking away or agreeing with you. It gives you the freedom to ask for what you need and not fear being rejected." (08:54 | Zovig Garboushian)
"Recognizing your value and knowing without a shadow of a doubt your worth is the antidote to self-doubt." (15:50 | Zovig Garboushian) 
"We spend a lot of time worrying about not knowing enough and looking foolish or silly in front of people and getting things wrong. All of that stuff can start to quiet when we develop a strong, continuous relationship with ourselves. Because when you understand yourself, it becomes harder to judge yourself. You know what you are, and more importantly, you know what you're not." (17:04 | Zovig Garboushian) 
"If we're always blocking the answers, by doing and doing and doing, we will not get to our own answers. You deserve the time to be quiet, have a moment of reflection, and just sort of ponder the things that are open-ended for you, the things that are meaningful for you, that if solved, or if answered, could change the course of your life." (24:56 | Zovig Garboushian)
"Understanding our essence helps us see how much more we are than how we typically see ourselves." (28:28 | Zovig Garboushian)
"Once we start to understand ourselves at the level of essence, we can then take things or leave things. We can see where we have freedom in our choices. We can move through doubt with more fluidity and ease. We are okay that there is no there for us to get to, and we can connect with the answers that we already have inside us." (31:37 | Zovig Garboushian) 
Links
Connect with Zovig Garboushian:
Website: www.boldnessablazecoaching.com
 
Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

E1: My Take on Self-Awareness And Why It's Critical For a Good Life

“Self-awareness is not just the idea that you've gone to therapy or you've listened to some feedback or you've taken a personality assessment or two” says Zovig Garboushian as she unpacks the first episode of "When Does It Get Good?," Zovig delves into the essence of self-awareness. She says self-awareness is not just about recognizing your traits or the impressions you leave on others, but engaging in a deep and ongoing process of understanding your thoughts, choices, and how you connect with the world around you.
 
Zovig challenges the societal norm that glorifies constant doing over simply being–a cycle that often prevents us from engaging in meaningful self-reflection. This episode is for achievers, perfectionists, and anyone who feels an unexplained emptiness despite all the accomplishments. As an executive coach and leadership advisor, Zovig shares insights from her own life—like grappling with Graves' disease and the realization that the peak of success wasn't as fulfilling as expected—to illustrate the path to genuine fulfillment. By adopting a curious mind, practicing self-compassion, and accepting our true selves, we can break free of societal expectations and find peace within our own skin. 
 
Whether you're leading a team, navigating personal challenges, or simply in pursuit of a more authentic life, this episode lays the groundwork for a transformative journey towards self-awareness. Dive into "When Does It Get Good?" to discover how to embrace the beauty of being over doing, and why understanding yourself is the key to unlocking a life of purpose and peace.
 
Quotes
“Self-awareness is so much more than just doing the therapy. It's knowing who you are because you've taken the time to look. And that shifts how we show up in our lives. And it shifts how we make our choices and how we connect with others. It makes things easier when we know ourselves.” (24:34 | Zovig Garboushian)
“The one thing that stands out the most prominently is that everyone just wants peace of mind. We want things that work. We want to do things that feel good. Obviously, we want to make good money and be able to take care of ourselves and our families, but we want to feel congruent and aligned with ourselves, not pretzeling ourselves to be something that we think we should be or feel pressure to be. The key to that is knowing who we are. The key is self-awareness.” (04:48 | Zovig Garboushian) 
We are responsible for discovering parts of ourselves and how they developed so that we can make conscious choices about whether or not those behaviors and thoughts work for us. I am the way I am. I showed up a certain way, I learned a bunch of stuff, I was bestowed some beliefs, and I have spent the better part of my adulthood challenging those things and asking myself, but does this work for me? (11:10 | Zovig Garboushian)
“The harder we are on ourselves, the less compassion we have for ourselves, the more we chip away at our esteem, our confidence, our self-worth, the more disconnected we get from ourselves and what we want and what motivates us.” (15:36 | Zovig Garboushian) 
So that's the trifecta of self-awareness, the relationship that you have with yourself. Curiosity, compassion, and acceptance. And I think that once we get to that point where we're able to do those things and they become just what we do and who we are, like it's a default to be curious. It's a default to give myself the benefit of the doubt and be compassionate. It's a default to remind myself, oh yeah, that's not who I am. This is who I am. Then we can become more of those things for other people. And then things really start to shift in our lives. (23:56 | Zovig Garboushian)
 
Links
Connect with Zovig Garboushian:
Website: www.boldnessablazecoaching.com
Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

When Does It Get Good? - Trailer

When Does It Get Good? is for the overachievers, perfectionists,  leaders, and consummate doers who give everything to everything. From the outside, it looks like you have it all but you secretly feel like something’s still missing. 
In this twice-monthly show, we’ll dive into why it still feels this way and how you can create the  joy, success, and peace of mind you crave. We’ll cover topics like how to stop questioning your judgment, unlocking your natural creativity and talent, leading with more influence, shutting down the shoulds, tapping into your intuition, and having unshakeable self-trust.
The mission: to help you reconnect with and rediscover yourself so you feel freedom to make bold choices and go after what you want with 100% confidence. Every episode aims to inspire and motivate you with tools, ideas, and resources to help you unlearn the traditional rules that have kept you playing it safe for way too long. 
No cliches. No shortcuts. We put in the work to help you get from where you are to where you want to go. This is where things get good.